happy birthday melissa fu xunru!


blessings always. feel honoured okay. haha.. i know it's a far cry for what you did for me on my birthday. will make it up to you someday. i miss four/one and everything back in amkss. thanks for being a great friend in s'pore and from s'pore, and an ANTI-DEPRESSION ally! lol.

and happy birthday mum!

PS: it's now 11.57pm singapore time on may 31. so i'm early! countdown to june 1! the troublesome time difference is killing me..

my bro came across this HILARIOUS video based on a scene in 'lotr'. check it out. make sure your hokkien isn't rusty. lol..

the start of my summer school. and i already have the feeling of wanting to leave early and for it to end ASAP! it sucks. school sucks. gah!
new term means new students. and yes, i was trying to look out for singaporeans so that it will be easier to relate to. haven't met any yet though.. oh, and from tmr onwards school starts at 1.30pm to 4.30pm! wth.. there goes my day.

i received a call from UTSC on friday. i got an offer of admission to UoT! at last.. :)

watched Star Wars III: Revenge of the Sith. the show was awesome.. master yoda and his twisted sentences like 'trouble, i sense'; anakin skywalker and his crazy new self: the darth vadar; padme amidala and her death with the birth of twins; obi-wan kenobi and his battle with his apprentice with light-sabres; coruscant and its high spires and towers.. i suppose it will take another 3 more yrs before the next episode comes out. hhhmmmppff..
i've become a star wars fan.

go now, i must!

smelt of animal poo yesterday. went to the toronto metro zoo with my bro for one of his anthropology assignment: observe primates for 1 hr.

the zoo is way way bigger than the zoos i been too. it's separated into the different regions. there were many species of animals, but i saw more scenery than of animals. why? long pathways with trees, plants, and more greens.

we started with looking at the different monkeys for my bro's assignment.. my bro decided on gorillas. had to observe how they behave in so many aspects: like family diversity, tool usage, etc. so took LOTS of pics of gorillas. had the 1-hr observation where we watched the gorillas laze around, and sort of play violently. went for lunch and met the zookeeper which we finally were able to differentiate the gorillas and find out more about the family and behaviour.
toronto zoo has a very interesting gorilla family. first there is papa charles, with 2 wives samantha and josephine. despite jo being the oldest, she is of lower rank than sam. sam has 3 kids: subira (9 yrs-old male), shalia (3 yrs-old female), and sadiki (3 mnth-old 99%-confirmed male). it's hard to determine the sex as males have very very tiny... anyway sam was carrying sadiki as she sat in one corner. jo has 2 kids: jomo (male), and johari (4 yrs-old female). jomo was moved to cincinnati, usa, because he challenged charles once he matured and the zookeeper had to separate him from the grp. well now subira is showing more aggression.
here are some pics of the primates out of the many many we took:


the mandrills which are large baboons


ah-meng! okay, the westernized orangutan.


the gorilla villa


jo resting, johari or shalia on the net


charles, with his silver-back and butt facing us, looking at his 3 kids: subira, johari and shalia


johari and shalia playing around


johari or shalia with her feet on the play-thing

after the whole monkey business, it was finally time for us to tour the zoo. and that was the point where i started to grow tired and want to leave the zoo (especially after standing in front of the gorilla villa for a few hrs). saw some interesting animals, many which were LAZING and SLEEPING!


african artifacts


a peacock on the roof of the africa restaurant, which sells burgers and pizzas. african?


light shining through the green canopy


dead? no, just a slping tiger


an awake, but lazy tiger


llamas on the slope


me with a lazy llama


red and pink. flamingos!


rabbits-on-stilts: maras


a red panda climbing up a tree


the wild horse: przewalski's horse


me at the entrance, leaving the toronto zoo

and off i left. i've SO grown out of zoos..

okay no zoo, no animals today. all for laundry.

i'm feeling real low. deep-bottom low. dark-abyss low. started with yesterday's sudden memories, and discovering how much i still cannot let go the past. and then today after some blog-surfing, it worsened.
things really aren't the same anymore. so are the ppl. so maybe in the mouth things come out how it should sound, but the heart isn't aligned to that same feeling.

for 2 nights i have had the same dream. more of nightmares on the dreaded 'O' levels. i dreamt about having the day before to study for the actual exam. must have been all the memories that have been flooding my little brain. even affecting my night thoughts.

wake me up. from the nightmares; back to dreams.. from the imagination; back to reality..

went to pacific mall with chaucer and met emily, andy and one of his friend, daniel there. was bored out there so we left for bowling. had one game and i stopped..
i miss bowling, no doubt. especially playing it with the gang of eleven back in singapore. it's kind of like bowling is the thing we do and it feels unnatural playing it with other friends. it just makes me think back of things- like having to strike or spare to make mel fu stay back during the chalet, or staying back in the bowling alley at hougang after we took neoprints, or having rounds of 'no-count' so that some of us could try out twirling the ball like pros.. it'll just make me so stupid and feel bad if that isn't what the rest feels too. call me a fool because i know that things aren't what it is anymore.
ah well, so andy drove us back. we were stuck in a traffic jam. i was late for dinner. bummer.

tmr i'll be going to toronto zoo. my bro have an assignment to monitor monkeys for an hour. quite cool but weird. and the urge of shopping have just grown.. i need to SHOP!

i smell a rat. or rather, i saw a rat! eeewww.. help! call 911, it's an emergency.
my housemate spotted it first and called me out to the living rm. then we tried to lure it out of a corner where we stacked up boxes and misc items. it zoomed out and we dashed to my room. and now we don't know where it is. we have to get a mousetrap and wait till may 31 for the fumigation for the rat.

till then pls don't let it enter my room.

i chatted with my dear 'ah ann'- lum kian ann. and did some catching up which brought me back some memories.

1) class play. the graduating classes put up class plays once again. i rmb mrs chung let lianhe videocam four/one's class play. and only at the end of the play did we realise that the tape was the video-cleaner tape. gggrrr..
2) parent-teacher conference. tmr will be amkss's ptc. the dreaded ptc has not been my favourite parent-teacher interaction in my amkss life. what would the teacher ever say to my parents? :o
3) neoprints. exco still owe me neoprints. i rmb going out with ann, mich and karthi once and i pleaded with them to take neoprints. but they refused. and till now i don't have a single neoprint with them. arrrgghh.
4) co-curricular activities. around this time graduating students would have to step-down. i miss drama club and student council!
5) 'O' levels. the graduating classes nightmare is approaching. never let me relive it. i'm glad it's way over for me..

well, at least i can hold on to memories..

the start of the holidays. and i'm filling myself with long hours of watching the first season of desperate housewives and charmed, and playing many games of civilization III.
i'm more than appreciative for this break from school, though sometimes the boredom gets to me. but what better way than to slack in this holiday, so no complaints!

and in a short while, i'll be back to the routine..

happy birthday lil' sis!
you are fifteen. may your wishes come true! (:


PS: it's now 12.03pm singapore time on may 21. so i'm neither early nor late. lol.

for the final day of the term for school today it was a prize-giving ceremony. i got a few awards: 3 for calculus, english and biology, all except chemistry; 1 for overall highest average. quite unexpecting actually.

so the day was practically school, lunch and home. one week of rest and slack before i head back to school for my remaining 2 summer courses: geometry and physics, which i really suck in. bless me..

i came across this web of a new movie to be out on december 9 2005. long way more to go, i know. but it's so interesting. it's based on c.s. lewis 'the chronicles of narnia: the lion, the witch and the wardrobe'. got me sooo excited..
here's the trailer:


The Chronicles Of Narnia:
The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe

i'm utterly dumbfounded, depressed, devastated and duh-ed off by the judges' decision. but america's next top model is naima.
no drumroll for kahlen, boohoo.. i was rooting for her. so close yet so far. no, she was at it. she shined and will w/o antm.. nevertheless naima was great, but not as great as kahlen.

always a kahlen fan. (:

i was awaken at 9.30am saying we had to go to school to return our lockers. i rushed out of the house and arrived in school. returned the lockers, and that's all. what a bummer! i planned to sleep in till late and just slack around at home. well had lunch and then roamed at fairview mall with some friends.

later on is the season finale of america's next top model! can't wait. i'm a kahlen fan. :)

hooray my exams are over! i'm soo sooo glad. been sleeping late the past few nights stressing and mugging. finally all done.

okay i have to confess. i haven't been that hardworking. last saturday was like a rest/play day. watched shows on my computer and then went for dinner at chinatown. had a late-night movie at fairview mall with my bro, housemate and her bf to watch house of wax.
the show is for 18 and above, so i'm "not suited" to watch it. but still i got into the cinema freely, with my housemate's id for backup. the show isn't bad, something like i know what you did last summer where there's the psycho killer (2 in fact, in this movie) who kills and then waxes them for this wax house.. there's alot of blood and gore, gruesome. miss paris hilton stars in it, and it's kind of funny and sickening how she dies. watch it for yourself to find out. :p

yesterday's chemistry paper and today's biology paper was a mess. it isn't extremely hard, but irritating as most of those that i didn't focus on came out. calculus was easier than expected..

so the remaining of this week will be free till friday when i return for my report card and the last day of this school term! i'm gonna slack and sleep in late! muahahaha.

yippy english paper done. it was one full essay which we had to make reference to our past plays, novel, short stories that we had done. and also a passage where we had to draw out a plot graph and answer questions.
we were allowed to leave every hour of the exam. i missed the second hour by a little but thankfully the teacher asked who else wants to leave. so i quickly raised my hands and left. if not i would have to wait another one hour more till the end of the paper!

2 more days of exams to go! another 2 days for mugging! but sunday is a 3-hr survivor finale.. gah gah! off for now..

another few more days to go till school officially ends. of course i have to leap over the exam hurdle first. tmr will be a half-day because of fri's exams, and after mon and tues, heaven.

presented my english ISU today. made paper figures and attached them to straws from mac donalds. yesterday i went to mac cafe and took a bunch of straws from them. :S
my housemates helped with the drawing of some of the animals (the novel is based on noah's ark) and colouring. i guess the presentation went kind of well, although i think i passed the 5-minutes limit.

just mugging for exams now. bless me.

i just got the most shocking and disappointing news ever.. wth. my mind is in a whirl right now. i'm probably not returning to kl or singapore next yr. dum-dum-dum-da!
serious. what's worse is that i may just stay right in toronto for the next few yrs till i complete my education to spread out my courses in university so that i don't have to rush. oh god! i was so looking forward to go back, see my friends, relive the past life. and now?

i have nothing to say. but just mug for my test tmr and coming exams. bless me.

yesterday i joined the school for a cruise trip down at toronto's harbourfront. took this olden day cargo ship, kajama, which had big sails. had an enjoyable time.. here are some pictures to tell the journey..


me fooling around with the camera before leaving. we met at school at 9.30am and behind me are the lockers.


chaucer, kevin and christine's turn to fool around with the camera.


angelina, chaucer, wingyan and andy on the bus. we crapped and look at the congested highway, and the nice scenery of downtown toronto. it's kind of messy and ugly as there are many construction sites for high-rise condominiums and buildings. but it will be breathtaking with the tall buildings after completion.


the blue magic school bus that took us to our destination: the harbourfront of toronto!


the kajama written at the port side. had this learning session, the port side is the left side from the captain's wheel. the starbird is the right side. it seems this was made up so that they wouldn't be confused with whose left or right.


the main sail of the kajama.


the mast and sails of the kajama.


sunshine behind the tall mast and sails of the kajama. heaven was kind on us for giving us sunshine and warm temperatures after weeks of raining. but the sea breeze was COLD till the afternoon when it warmed up.


the pier at harbourfront. all ahoy! the ship leaves the dock and we had to raise the sails after we were away from shore. palms on the thick rope results in red painful skin!


see the light shine through the glass panel as we sit in the lower deck for our lunch.


emily, me, andy, angelina, chaucer after our pizza and drinks. we played cards, daidee!


we head to the upper deck where there's music and it's not that cold anymore. chaucer starts the 'tongue-out' craze..


and look.. this is what u get.


the wide blue sea.
where earth meets heaven at the horizon.


off i fly to.. where?


more of me.


and even more of me..


getting sick? here's the group pic. of course there were other who went but i hanged out with these ppl. i miss everyone back in spore!


toronto's skyline from afar.


and this is the skyline a little closer as we headed back for shore.


toronto's city centre airport on this island off the mainland. it's for small model airplanes.. so we saw many land and depart..


just like this one about to take off.


and look, the geese are taking off as our ship approaches! so here is the flight of the geese.


buoy on the waters of the sea. it reads 'vessels over 18m high contact airport on vhf 12 for clearance to approach'. hhmm...?


the CN tower much closer as seen from the ship with the large white sails of the kajama..


we approach the pier. so before we reached, a snapshot of me with CN tower overlooking the rogers centre dome.


and so the journey ended. me, chaucer, kevin, christine and angelina walked to downtown toronto. passed by this underground highway at union station, and the cars' headlights made me take a photo. of course, i rmb to turned off the camera's flashlight. then we found our way to eaton centre where i went home for laundry.
a day out at sea. the voyage which returned me to where i started off from..

dae jang geum is back! hooray! it's being released with english subtitles so we are once again on track watching the 2nd volume.. just watched one of the episodes which have brought me to tears. and now i can say the next episode will also bring more tears.. what a wrong time to have it especially since my exams are coming!!! arrrgghh!

this week was an ordeal. monday stayed up to finish my chemistry independent study unit (ISU) which included a presentation to teach the class on wednesday. tuesday i stayed up late to finish my biology ISU on GMOs that was due on wednesday. did a poster and a report.. and then on wednesday i stayed up late again to do my english ISU essay. so gosh my eyes was droopy and sore. and i survived!

oh yes i received something from my 'dai-gajie' yien from singapore! thanks so much en. awesome stuffs, like..


a card shaped in my name 'zi hao'


wire-tag just for 'hoe'
america's next top model is down to the final four! i'm rooting for kahlen and my sixth sense tells me she will win..
have to start mugging for the finals! then it will be a break, summer course, and off to university! yippy! work hard! =)