today was the 'O' level release of results.. didn't really noe how well our sch but it shld be able to bring us up in level i hope.. its like the stress is amountin on us already. terrible. i dunnoe if there were all the tearing or smiling stuffs that usually takes place..

well sch today wasn't really that sch-lish.. in a way, the start of sch was zonk radio countdown.. top 5 songs
5. good charlotte - hold on
4. blue - signed, sealed, delivered
3. outkast - hey ya!
2. hilary duff - come clean
1. gareth gates - say it isn't so
we sorta blasted the place so that more ppl could hear. mr ong came calling us to stop for assembly. begged him to let us finish the last song which he did.. lol.

i attended the first english literary and debating club meeting. at first i wasn't sure if i wanted, but pamy & faridah kept asking me too.. signed up and now im not sure if i made the right decision or not. shldn't really had so could concentrate more on drama and student council stuff.. shld i go and ask to dropout again? haix. i was quite lethargic at the start but it got better later. alot of drama ppl are also in dat club man. did some stuffs and left for home.

thnk god there isn't much hmwk or tests next wk. tmr will be goin to macritchie and trek to bukit timah hill for this bio field trip which i tink will be fun! but the bad thing is must reach there at 7:15am which means i must like wake up at 5:30am or so.. looks like tonight will be an early night.....

"Try" - Nelly Furtado

All I know
Is everything is not as it's sold
But the more I grow the less I know
And I have lived so many lives
Though I'm not old
And the more I see, the less I grow
The fewer the seeds the more I sow

Then I see you standing there
Wanting more from me
And all I can do is try
Then I see you standing there
Wanting more from me
And all I can do is try

I wish I hadn't seen all of the realness
And all the real people are really not real at all
The more I learn the more I cry
As I say goodbye to the way of life
I thought I had designed for me

Then I see you standing there
Wanting more from me
And all I can do is try
Then I see you standing there
I'm all I'll ever be
But all I can do is try
Try

All of the moments that already passed
We'll try to go back and make them last
All of the things we want each other to be
We never will be
And that's wonderful, and that's life
And that's you, baby
This is me, baby
And we are, we are, we are, we are
Free
In our love
We are free in our love

ohh yar, this is a once-in-a-while news.. i am actually home since 4. it's been some time since i had nothing else to do in sch and will just come home to eat, slp, play. it's been like dunnoe since when i last went out with frens to catch a movie, go to the beach, walk and talk doin nothing [frens.. when was the last time we did dat eh?] when else can we do dat?
after the 'O's!!!
damn it. i hate this type of paper-chase life. it's like i haf lost what i gained when i was in sec 1 and 2. how i miss those days. haix. i just have this sudden depression. excuse me from typing more. rest.

the geog challenge was held on sat. i dun tink we made it even though the results are not out yet. alot of other sch, big shot sch, were there. there was this part where we had to use our problem-solving skills, and they really used it as they wrote long ans. ours was like a short sweet para of points. maybe simplicity will stand out. [blah blahx. wad crap.] was at nus which was pretty neat. ms chow used to be from there so she brought us around in her car while she drove us back to sch. hopped off as we passed by my house. stayed here all thru.

blehx. dunnoe wad i did for the past few days but all i noe is dat i survived the ordeals which i placed an oath to do. bless me.

*bless those who are getting back their 'O' results this friday. a moment of intense. really must watch how they react coz i will be experiencing it next yr. imagine those tears and sweat, laughter and shocked faces. must learn from them.. :p
orrh yar, got the verification slips for our 'O's today. the total cost is $409 (inclusive of $19.40 worth of GST which could provide for 3 mac extra value meal!). judgement day is drawing closer as time passes.

bless our souls.

RECAP: used the word 'bless' 3 times in this post [am i goin (a)nuts or (b)bonkers? up to u to decide] {0.o}

"100 Years" - Five For Fighting

I'm 15 for a moment
Caught in between 10 and 20, and I'm just dreaming
Counting the ways to where you are
I'm 22 for a moment
She feels better than ever and we're on fire
Making our way back from Mars

15 there's still time for you
Time to buy and time to lose
15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got a 100 years to live

I'm 33 for a moment
Still the man, but you see I'm a they
A kid on the way, a family on my mind
I'm 45 for a moment
The sea is high and I'm heading into a crisis
Chasing the years of my life

15 there's still time for you
Time to buy, time to lose yourself within a morning star
15 I'm all right with you
15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got a 100 years to live

Half time goes by
Suddenly you're wise
Another blink of an eye
67 is gone
The sun is getting high
We're moving on...

I'm 99 for a moment
Dying for just another moment and I'm just dreaming
Counting the ways to where you are

15 there's still time for you
22 I feel her too
33 you're on your way
Every day's a new day...

15 there's still time for you
Time to buy and time to choose
Hey 15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got a 100 years to live

dunnoe why but at times i just seem to have lost my direction.
it's like being caught up in my own time and not knowing what to do next.
the feeling of uncertainty and insecurity of what will come after.

it's like reading through the whole storybook just to find a line.
it's like swimming deep down an ocean just to find a seashell.
it's like being able to see but living life in a blur.

"I Promise" - Stacie Orrico

Will I always be there for you?
When you need someone, Will I be that one you need?
Will I do all my best to, to protect you?
When the tears get near your eyes
Will I be the one that's by your side?
Will I be there when you call me in the middle of the night?
Will I keep the rain from falling down into your light?
I promise, I promise
I promise I will

Will I take tender tender care of you?
Take your darkest night and make it bright for you
Will I be there to make you strong and to lean on?
When this world has turned so cold
Will I be the one that's there to hold?

Will I be there when you call me in the middle of the night?
Will I keep the rain from falling down into your light?
I promise, I promise
I promise I will

Will I be there when you call me in the middle of the night?
Will I keep the rain from falling down into your light?
I promise, I promise
I promise I will

Yeah
And I love you more every day
And nothing will take that love away
When you need someone
I promise I'll be there for you (there for you)
I promise

Will I be there when you call me in the middle of the night?
Will I keep the rain from falling down into your light?
I promise, I promise
I promise I will

And I promise (and I promise)
I promise (oh I promise you)
I will be there when you call me (when you call me)
I promise (I promise)
I promise I will

it has been another wk.. it just seem rather idiotic that everytime i come online it will be about sch or stress or hmwk.. but dat is my life and i i must face to the so-called reality.. well it has been a week since i came online. with all the tests and work, who could ever find time to blog.

monday tuesday wednesday thursday and friday. all which i sort of had to rush hmwk and learn for tests. council not much things now. drama even less. the work keeps piling in. during the pasts days without coming to blog i had alot of stuffs i wanted to say. but now it seem like everything is only just a memory. i dun rmb wad i wanted to say so badly. and now it just seems like something is missing, not perfect.

thursday i skipped lessons almost the whole day. went to canberra sec sch with lianghock for a dry-run for COMPASS, which is a community-involvement-activities presentation to some principals (the real deal is some time later to some minister & wads worse is i haven even attended a single session of meet-the-ppl session which we were doin on). well this was a joint presentation with mayflower and yio chu kang sec sch. yck didn't turn up for they had common test or sumting. the most interesting thing must be the wasps attack @ canberra sec. one class was like shouting and the banging of tables could be heard. damn funny.
later went back to sch, had a few periods of lessons and went home straight. didn't attend house practice. 2nd time in a row man. mrs nair is so gonna kill me. but got excuse- the first time was bcoz of valentine's day and she excused us after ms ng kp requested, and this time for meet-the-ppl session. had to go home to change and stuffs. thought of doing hmwk when i finished lunch but fell aslp. when i woke up had to go for the mps already.
mps @ cpcc. the most interesting thing was the lending a listening ear to the ppl there. those ppl who went there really had major problems and difficulties that they faced like not being able to pay bills and stuffs. the case i heard was like those melodrama tv serials where everything bad seemed to fall on the same person. the session was quite an eye-opener and really thought me alot of things about life.

had health check today and then chemistry remedial. it seems like the whole of this yr is remedials, supplementary lessons, extra lessons and stuff. haix. tmr still have this geochallenge which i totally am not prepared for it..

.: hoping for a miracle to survive the coming storms :.

this wk has been a busy wk.. not only with 4 tests (previously 5 tests but ah guang postponed physics test) but with crazy council work. there will be 4 tests next wk with remedials and hmwk.

it seems like nearly every nights of weekdays i will be slping past 1 or 2. slept at 2:30am the previous nite, the previous previous nite was close to 2.. last nite just had to slp early, at 12 plus. counted it early as compared to the past late nights i have been experiencing..

angered the wrath of my father lately. wed and yesterday i went home past 10 which was unacceptable by my father especially since he noes dat we have been slping later previously. wed he didn't really mind coz he came home later den me and my sis as he was playing mahjong with his kakis.. and den on thurs he burst out slamming the phone when we called or wadsoever. typical.

the problem was dat we needed to rush the souveniers for valentine's day. michelle and her team got lots of wonderful ideas but little manpower. maybe time or the manpower constraints really took the toil out of the same grp of ppl.. me, edward, mich, my sis, jialing, meiyan, yile, kuangyong went to mich's house for 2 consecutive days staying late just to finish up glass cup holders or wax cups (lianghock and scott came yesterday to help).. felt bad in a way as imposed on mich's family. weizhen, annie, liyan, ashley, yuping also stayed in sch to finish up the flower bouquets and stuff. and so ended up goin home late and my father threatened to complain to the sch and my teacher which is so the. i tink he forgot about it anyway. *phew
well valentine's day was alrite though a little messy. we refunded those that were not made and i tink we still made a small marginal profit (better den nth). really must plan ahead. made me feel the need to tell shehnas to start on her int'l friendship day event soon though it is april =x

*yawn* im tired and slpy. my eyes barely opening as i type this. next wk will be another busy wk. late nites again. haix. gd nite den.

chinese oral was today. firstly woke up late. set the alarm clock at 7 but ended waking up at 9 when i was supposed to reach sch by 945. lucky made it in time. and waited for some time b4 it started. it was ok, not too hard or wadsoever. den went down to the red cross rm to check out on sam, jiayu, shinye, yixuan. seemed like red cross was in a middle of a partition. getting bad to worse. den went to mac for break wif sheryl, mel, zhiyen, sam, jiayu, shinye, yixuan, ryan, joseph, edwinc, keith, joel, marvin, lester. was like a gathering. den wanted go ryan's house but didn't in the end. went to northpoint, yishun for flag day. went around b4 heading to nee soon east cc.

todays nkf's flag day.. and it totally sucked. when compared to last few flag days where i knew who and where to go, this yr was all the 'not-sure' attitude. i just went where i felt like goin and finally ended up somewhere.
managed to find company in grace, pamy, peipei, joseph, shinye after a long questioning. didn't do much of flag day so i donated most of the contributions. haix. goin broke.
wanted to go to heeren for the mtv asia awards mosh pit.. but when we walked past there it ended and we met charlotte, cheehian, huifang.. we continues doing useless rounds. ended up at orchard mrt so headed back.
met jiayu and yixuan at yishun. returned the damn ting and waited for sam to come back b4 some of us (me, jiayu, sam, joseph, keith) went for dinner at northpoint. saw sihong, yipling with family, cleo with joyce, karthi with chuanyao. ate and left.
i reached home surprised to find my parents and sis at home. they didn't go out.

well today's busy day taken up most of my time. better go do work and get some slp for tuition tmr. haix. still need to study for tests.. wad a bummer life is. to tink i found life amazing yesterday after seeing the exhibits and now i'm contradicting myself............

after the day's busy schedule dat i went thru in a slpy state (drowsed off in bio and eng lessons), i was finally awoken by the fact dat i was on my way to see dead bodies preserved with time, or plasticinised so dat it wont rot and stink. the body world's exhibition has been a big hit in spore, so it seems, and i finally went together with a whole lot of ppl for a science trip to spore expo..
the fact was i was drowsing off on the bus too.. though i had my md glued to my ears and chinese vocab paper in my hands, still could not resist the alluring urge to slp. joel, who sat beside me, did. it was a long way there.
waited like hell before we were allowed to enter. the hall was't dat big and when i made my way to the exhibits- wow total awe. bodies and more bodies stood there with either their skin, muscles, bones, arteries detached from the main body to show the diff sets of wonders of the human anatomy.
definitely no censorship. the whole body was displayed, and organs and tumours and pieces of bodies were around the place. i tink the most interesting part was the one where we were allowed to touch a sample of a brain and liver. the brain and liver looked fake; the brain looked like mooncake colour. then there was also this particular body which had a visible tatoo on his hand. well-preserved. there was also a body of a smoker with its black lungs shown. this really would have made smokers wan to quit, for some.
really left me thinking about life and a whole lot of stuffs. ppl donated their bodies for the sake of education. magnaminous. and then there was the fact dat the simplest organ or wadever in our body actually could b so significant in its importance. just like no matter how low-profiled one is, there is still things that they do best and outshine the rest.
how God created us is an amazement. the mechanisms in our body- complicated matters. figuring it out will take my slp time. so adios!

yesterday was 'chap goh mei', the 15th and last day of chinese new yr and the chinese day for valentine's. my family just went down to orchard crystal jade to have a dinner den came home.

earlier on i had drama meeting. more ppl came this time, both sec 1s and seniors of drama club. we had auditions for the silver jubilee carnival performance for all upper sec pupils. the lower sec started preparing for their lunchtime performance. later me and pamy brought the new members aside and gave them the basics of theatre acting. didn't really noe wad others to tell them bsides 'chitting out', projecting, blah blah. did some warm ups dat we usually will do beofre rehearsals. then left for house practice @ yck stadium.

it was raining. tot house practice would b cancelled but it did not. jogged one round and started raining heavily. took shelter and after a while when the rain died we ran another round again. finally the rain dispersed us as we all were allowed to go home. rainy day, or shld i say wk.. sorta nice and windy but it is dark and gloomy.. how long will this depressing weather go on?

"You Don't Miss Your Water Till The Well Runs Dry"
- Craig David

As I sail with you across the finest oceans
On a way to find the key to our emotions
Together we will move the clouds to brighter days
Some people question what I say
Tried to break up you and me
But I know this love between us is growing stronger
You can call me whenever from wherever
Just remember that
I'll be there
Through all the stormy weather
Us break up never
No we'll be together
Forever

You don't miss your water 'til the well runs dry
But I believe so strongly in you and I
Can somebody answer me the question why
You don't miss your water til the well runs dry

As I close my eyes
Sit back while reminiscing
Of when we used to fuss and fight but end up kissing
There may be sad and pain for time so long to wait
But in my heart you'll always be everything and more to me
For I know this love between us is growing stronger
You can call me whenever from wherever
Just remember that
I'll be there
Through all the stormy weather
Us break up never
No we'll be together
Forever

You don't miss your water 'til the well runs dry
But I believe so strongly in you and I
Can somebody answer me the question why
You don't miss your water til the well runs dry

For you are always on my mind
You are always on my mind
Girl you know that you
You are always
You are always on my mind
You are always forever

You don't miss your water 'til the well runs dry
But I believe so strongly in you and I
Can somebody answer me the question why
You don't miss your water til the well runs dry

You don't miss your water girl no
But I believe so strongly in you and I yeah
Can somebody answer me the question why
Cause you don't miss your water 'til the well runs dry yeah listen
If you ever get the feeling
You wanna play around starting cheating, remember
You don't miss your water 'til the well runs dry

living each day in a blur

i seem to be lost in a daze
unknowing when or how i will be awake
but maybe someday or sometime i will find myself once again
and maybe then will i truly know the truth behind what seems to be

fallen deep down, without even knowing it
blinded to everything around me by everything around me
i seem to have lost my sense
as time freezes for the very moment

i am living life each day in a blur.

"Where Is The Love?" - Black Eyed Peas feat.
Justin Timberlake

What's wrong with the world, mama
People livin' like they ain't got no mamas
I think the whole world addicted to the drama
Only attracted to things that'll bring you trauma
Overseas, yeah, we try to stop terrorism
But we still got terrorists here livin'
In the USA, the big CIA
The Bloods and The Crips and the KKK
But if you only have love for your own race
Then you only leave space to discriminate
And to discriminate only generates hate
And when you hate then you're bound to get irate, yeah
Badness is what you demonstrate
And that's exactly how anger works and operates
N**, you gotta have love just to set it straight
Take control of your mind and meditate
Let your soul gravitate to the love, y'all, y'all

People killin' people dyin'
Children hurtin you hear them cryin'
Can you practice what you preach
And would you turn the other cheek

Father, Father, Father help us
Send us some guidance from above
'Cause people got me, got me questionin'
Where is the love (Love)

Where is the love (The love)
Where is the love (The love)
Where is the love
The love, the love

It just ain't the same, always unchanged
New days are strange, is the world insane
If love and peace is so strong
Why are there pieces of love that don't belong
Nations droppin' bombs
Chemical gasses fillin' lungs of little ones
With the ongoin' sufferin' as the youth die young
So ask yourself is the lovin' really gone
So I could ask myself really what is goin' wrong
In this world that we livin' in people keep on givin' in
Makin' wrong decisions, only visions of them dividends
Not respectin' each other, deny thy brother
A war is goin' on but the reason's undercover
The truth is kept secret, it's swept under the rug
If you never know truth then you never know love
Where's the love, y'all, come on (I don't really know)
Where's the truth, y'all, come on (I don't really know)
Where's the love, y'all

People killin', people dyin'
Children hurt and you hear them cryin'
Can you practice what you preach
And would you turn the other cheek

Father, Father, Father help us
Send us some guidance from above
'Cause people got me, got me questionin'
Where is the love (Love)

Where is the love (The love)
Where is the love (The love)
Where is the love
The love, the love

I feel the weight of the world on my shoulder
As I'm gettin' older, y'all, people gets colder
Most of us only care about money makin'
Selfishness got us followin' in the wrong direction
Wrong information always shown by the media
Negative images is the main criteria
Infecting the young minds faster than bacteria
Kids wanting to act like what they see in the cinema
Yo', whatever happened to the values of humanity
Whatever happened to the fairness in equality
Instead in spreading love we spreading animosity
Lack of understanding, leading lives away from unity
That's the reason why sometimes I'm feelin' under
That's the reason why sometimes I'm feelin' down
There's no wonder why sometimes I'm feelin' under
Gotta keep my faith alive to lovers bound

People killin', people dyin'
Children hurt and you hear them cryin'
Can you practice what you preach
And would you turn the other cheek

Father, Father, Father help us
Send us some guidance from above
'Cause people got me, got me questionin'
Where is the love (Love)

Where is the love (The love)
Where is the love (The love)
Where is the love (The love)

it's a holiday.. YIPEE! having so many holidays in a period of 2 weeks, but dat's gd.. shld have more of this. but i tink slim chance.. i still have hmwk and tests on the way, but i'm already looking forward to the coming weekend.. haix.

anyway i am now so into the music and sounds of my class play, the phantom of the opera.. it has music from the original musical performance which is like so soprano-opera type of music, but i'm loving it.. den we also haf sounds from 'pirates of the carribean' and 'lord of the rings'.. BIG production eh? LoL.

i better go get some slp now.. eyes closing though i haf been slping most of today.. *[yawn] nite!
[0.o]zzZ